Too Much Passion? Keep It Up

So, people like to be entertained, and there are many forms to be entertained by. Watching movies, playing music, making costumes….even pretending to be living in medieval times, and being a knight. That’s why we have hobbies, that is why we do the things we do. We like to pass time, with our hobbies, that’s what gives us relief, that’s what brings us back to our centers. We live to pursue our passions, or at least we should.

So, what happens when it doesn’t become fun anymore? Do we try and find a way to rekindle that passion(hey, I was out of the superhero thing for many years, egad!), or do we force ourselves to continue when we are clearly burnt out on that passion? What becomes of that passion when someone clearly wants something, but isn’t willing to work for it? What happens when you find people of the like mind, and their burn out starts to make it less enjoyable to you?

Look, hobbies are just that hobbies. Some people feel an obligation to continue on a hobby because that’s all they know. Look, if you are burnout, just quit, nobody’s going to stop you, and if you’re unhappy or in denial about change, then stop. Don’t bring a cloud down on people who want to enjoy what is there for the hobby, just because you can’t except yourself leaving that hobby. Then you push people back, and politic the shit out of it so that other’s are as miserable as you are. There was a time that you had a passion for these hobbies and now it’s like you have a cross to bare, just stop. All it does is seem to make you an asshole because you can’t except change.

I digress, I got a bit off course for a minute there. I have a passion for life, and I have a passion that covers a vast amount of different things in my life. I’ll admit that I’m finding my limits in some of those areas, but at the same time, I can take a moment and reset my mind, because I am passionate about those things. Quite frankly, I don’t want to lose those passions because it makes me who I am. I’m passionate about comics and superheroes. This world is shitty enough as it is with trolls trying to take other’s down because I think it’s funny or that they want to change the status quo in a negative way. People would rather watch you fall and spit on you, than to help you up and push you to succeed.

I’m passionate about geeky things, and I don’t have to share the specific subject that someone else is passionate about, to get excited to watch the fire when someone talks about how awesome frisbee golf is. I love the passion that people share when they talk about professional wrestling. I was there too, once, and I kind of got out of it, because I found it getting too stale, but God damn, I like watching my boy pretend that he’s John Cena, and his reactions to watching Raw or Smackdown. I like when my girls get all excited about Monster High and the new dolls that come out.

Passion is the only thing that should motivate us in life. If you’re passionate about making money and shopping, than you should be fired to do what it is that helps you get there. I’ve been a slave working jobs to make some money just to survive and support my family. I know what it’s like not to like going to work because there’s no passion there. I’m fortunate enough that I like the people I deal with on a regular basis to keep me going. Yes, this has been a very motivated blog this time, not only to vent my own frustrations with the world, but because this is something that I need to remind myself of as well.

Please, if you ever feel that the passion is gone, and the hobby doesn’t really interest you anymore, just stop. Let the other people continue to enjoy it until they stop having that passion. There’s no need to drag other people down into your misery with you.

This is the director and I’m calling this blog a wrap.

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Who Brought the Fire and Brimstone to the BBQ?

Normally, I try to keep things positive, sometimes serious, most of the time I try to bring the humor, but I’ve had things weighing heavy on me as of late. With that some thoughts that haven’t been so good, have been crossing my mind, so I think that I want to get these thoughts out, and let you decide.

Nobody is perfect, except one man, Jesus Christ. I know not everyone believes in him, and I can respect that, but he also brings a beacon of hope to so many people in this world. The scriptures talk about angels and demons at least a couple of times, so that’s where the lead off comes in….

Demon’s come in many shapes and sizes. Maybe an unhealthy addiction to food, I’ve been there…several times over. I’ve used food to cope with my feelings of inadequacy. I’ve used it to drown my depression. I’ve gained so much weight because of certain events that have gone on in my life, but I realize that food isn’t the answer. I’m trapped in several sizes too big, and that’s my fault. I don’t body shame anyone, because I know what it’s like to be teased about being over weight, Yes, I’ve gotten the side eye in judgement as well. No, you’re not cleaver, and yes making comments about being fat makes you an asshole, but there are some with genuine concern in their voice. The first time weight was a real issue of concern was in 2011. I got bit by a bug at work, and I went to get it checked. I was around 394 lbs at the time.

I did really well getting the weight off, I joined Weight Watchers  and I was working out several times a week. By the time I was done, I had lost 56 lbs. Man I was so proud of myself, I felt better, I looked better, and I moved better. They say exercise helps relieve stress, and I’m not sure if that was what was going on. I slept better, but it didn’t stop my depression from causing a melt down at work. I ended up taking 17 months off of work because of it. I didn’t want to deal with the world…food comforted me, and I gained all that weight and then some back. My therapist stated that he thought that my weight gain might have been a form of me trying to slowly kill myself. He was right, I wasn’t dealing with things in the proper light. I was making preparations of a life outside of the job I was suspended from, and I didn’t expect to go back….

I started working out this week, as I’m trying to gain my life back, and I will…just slower than before. I’ve got a bright future ahead of me and I can’t wait to reach that point.

Back to the subjects of demons, I’ve seen alcohol ruin a young person’s life. I’ve seen drugs ruin someone’s life. I’m blessed to have never had to deal with these myself, but I’ve family that has. I hope that the have or can find the help they need to over come that.

One of the demons that I’ve been dealing with is anger, I’ve gone a bit over board with it a few times, and I can’t take back the hurt it has done, but I’m working on it, because it needs to go away. It peaked with my ex and her father. I was so angry for so long that I was a ball of rage for the longest time. The worst part is that we tend to say the mean and nasty things when we are angriest. Some times, they may be more true than one would want to admit, the hurt remains, and I see the scars in the people who I’ve personally hurt.

I’ve been on both sides of the wall for various demons, and I’ll be the first to admit that I’m cautious about judging anyone about whatever might have gone on. So, I think that everyone should hear the whole story before condemning someone. I know that I’ve been on the wrong side of accusations before. Just some food for thought.

This is the Director, and that’s a wrap.